To Pee or Not to Pee. That is the Question.

I’m finally back to work. I’m a part-time Customer Service Support person with Senior Life Resources Northwest. I guess they couldn’t justify ageism being as how all their customers are over 60. I was actually the second choice for the position, but their first choice ended up finding a full-time position elsewhere. It’s only 25 hours a week, but that’s better than no hours a week. It couldn’t have come at a more opportune time. When I got the call, I was pretty much recovered from my kidney stone adventure (detailed in an earlier entry here), and my wife is having to take six weeks off for carpel tunnel surgery on both wrists. Labor and Industry is paying for most of that, but her pay will only be about 75% of regular until she gets back to work.

So, I am very thankful for the opportunity to work at all. So far, the people at the new job have been very supportive, happy to answer questions and patient in teaching me the routine and software programs. Besides that, everybody has been so damn nice to me! I hope it isn’t too good to be true. Call me paranoid, but I spent a large part of my life in the radio biz and paranoia is the name of that game.

I mentioned my kidney stone earlier. I’ve successfully passed around a half-dozen of the damn things over the years. Never found out what was causing them. My urologist finally got the results of this latest one (the Mount Rainier of kidney stones at 15 millimeters). Calcium somethingorother. UPS just delivered a kit to the house from some laboratory that’s going to analyze my urine output over a 24-hour period. I have to pee into this half-gallon plastic jug every time I need to go wee-wee for 24 hours, and note the volume of output each time. After the 24 hours is up, I’m supposed to shake the jug up thoroughly (making sure the cap is screwed on good and tight) and transfer the contents to two smaller plastic cups. Then I’ve got to UPS it back to the lab. The main problem, aside from following the step-by-step instructions, is going to be getting my wife to agree to my keeping the half-gallon jug in our refrigerator. Yep, the instructions say my precious pee has to be refrigerated the whole time I’m collecting it. Puts a whole new slant on pissing off the better half.

The Curmudgeon's Pet Peeves

I guess most all high schools have student newspapers. When I was young, we had junior high schools. I don’t know if junior high schools still exist. We had a newspaper at Cascade Junior High School, and when I was in ninth grade, I was on the newspaper staff. Thinking back, I remember that whenever a student was interviewed for the paper, there seemed to be a standard set of questions we budding journalists asked such as “what’s your favorite food?” (the standard answer was usually spaghetti), “who’s your favorite singer?” “what’s your favorite class?” and nearly always, “what’s your pet peeve?” Had someone ever interviewed me and asked me what my pet peeve was back then, I probably would have said something like, “Gary Demeyer, Don Calkins and Bud Norris.” Nobody ever asked and I probably escaped being severely killed.

I make a sincere effort nowadays to not have resentments. I have forgiven most all of the people who wronged me in real or imagined ways. However, I still have pet peeves. I am 60 years old, a bit of a curmudgeon, and I’m entitled. Close to the top of my list are stupid, inconsiderate drivers who tailgate me, who are too stupid to know how to use the simple devise called the directional signal lever, or think everybody within a five mile radius should share their pleasure in listening to their under-muffled cars and motorcycles and the incessant bass beat of their car stereos.

My wife and I just finished watching the Steven Spielberg version of “War of the Worlds” on DVD this evening. One of the first things I noticed was the stark, cold color processing used. I’ve noticed this same effect in a number of recent films. Is this the result of the new digital filmmaking process that cinematographers are using now? If it is, then allow me to express my humble opinion of this process – it is probably the worst thing to happen to cinema since sepia tone! It’s absolutely awful! What the hell was wrong with good old Cinemascope? The colors were vibrant and alive, not sterile and flat.

Expressing “my humble opinion” above brings up another of my pet peeves. Why are people who post messages on the Internet or send emails too lazy to spell things out so those of us who value good communication don’t have to refer to some webspeak glossary to translate? “IMHO” – the first time I saw this, I thought the writer was referring to a restaurant that served Swedish pancakes. I am thoroughly sick and tired of seeing LOL, (I originally thought LOL meant lots of luck. Imagine my embarrassment as an Internet novice, after posting to a job seekers’ message board that I wished someone LOL on their job interview. It’s got to be the most overused abbreviation of any kind on or off the web, and I absolutely hate it!). Others include, but are not limited to; ROTHFLMAO, R U 4 it, and I really hate seeing people referred to as “ppl” or “peeps”. A “peep” is the sound made by a baby chicken. I am not a tiny sound; I am a PERSON!

I am more saddened than peeved about the awful grammar and spelling I encounter in emails and all over the web. It is a sad, sad thing to see that the once enviable educational system in this country has failed its students so badly. I believe that taking the easy route of teaching phonics instead of teaching the elements of rudimentary English is to blame. How many times have I encountered something like, “How R U? Your lukin gud in yur picher U send me!!!!”?

I am particularly peeved about anything George “Dubya” Bush does or says. If he’s for something, I’m against it. If he’s against something, I’m for it. This guy has to be the worst president since Millard Fillmore! Actually, I’m being unfair to poor old Millard since it’s my understanding that he didn’t really want to be president.

I’m starting off the year 2006 without my 15 mm kidney stone, and I have finally been hired to work part-time beginning January 9th. Maybe I’ll be less of a curmudgeon during this new year. But then, what would I write in this blog about (LOL)?